AHhh i got put as another character for this thing tbh I'm just a gal that does whatvers left in the project but anyways I gotta make crying noises. CRYING? babes. how. wtf. arghhh legit spent half and hour listening to ppl crying to figure this shit out. I feel like a creep

In today's digital age, having a mobile app for your business is no longer just an option—it's a necessity. With millions of users accessing information and services through their smartphones, mobile appshave become the cornerstone of modern business strategies. However, creating a successful mobile app requires expertise, creativity, and technical proficiency. This is where hiring a mobile app developercan make all the difference.

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Hello. This The Victor and this  is my blog. Here I will post news  on my new updates to books. I will also answer any questions here . I will  try to update as much as I can. You might have also notice It has been a long time since I wrote anything but I will try to write more.

with that being said, here are soom things I would like  to say:

-Bad to the bone has 900 views so thank you so much

-speking of bad to the bone, bones return is now out

-and finally  hero my new book is now out

thanks for reading ​​​​​​​victor OUT!

For someone writing a blog about world domination I couldn’t be further from my ultimate goal. Right now I’m sitting in a chair all day, just staring at a screen being bored. Lazy I still tend to think. But I have to be honest with myself: chronic tiredness is a cruel villain. That doesn’t mean I don’t hate sitting here, staring at an empty page, trying to find the energy to at least do something today.It's a strange position I never thought I would find myself in. Still there’s some beauty in it. Because wouldn’t it make a great start for a story? A protagonist both chronically ill and chronically bored, trying to rule the world. Sure, it’s a long climb, but we all like an underdog.Now another problem is my utter lack of a plan. Most of the time I am just winging it. Not a great way to start if you want to rule them all. Well, most world leaders seem to do great by ignoring everyones problems and just doing what they feel like. But I actually want to be a sort of good person. Or at least, I want people to question if I am evil. Not outright know it for sure. So I have some thinking to do.Maybe there’s a few things on my to do list for now. They won’t get me quite where I want to be, but they are a first stepping stone of sorts. Something to work on while I’m working on the bigger things. I could probably even use them as a cover of sorts. Just in case an FBI agent clicks on this book and thinks it serious. Then they can just be like: nah, it’s just a woman talking about her books. Nothing to see here 🙂

Let me share those “plans” with you for now. None of them are set in stone, but I would love to get to do them.

-Get more of my covers on physical books (I'm on 3)-Grow my large cactus until it’s a meter tall (it’s about 70 cm already)-Publish a cute gay love story.(like real world publish)-Make a fully animated book trailer (for the record, I can’t actually animate)-Seek therapy (yes, I knew you would suggest it)I also considered adding not being chronically ill on the list, but I decided not to. I am a little too proud of the chronically ill and bored line. Would be a shame if I couldn’t use it anymore. Seriously I have a free pass to make all kinds of illness related jokes and I finally have a place to use them! I don’t want to lose that right by getting better. Would be kind of stupid, don’t you think?​​​​​​​Anyway, for now I’ve shared my goals with you. So maybe it’s time to do something with my life. Maybe I start with staring at my screen and thinking about my story for a bit. Turns out writing a fantasy book without a plot isn’t the greatest idea. But I can’t help it that my characters trew my plot away. I didn’t give them free will.I’m really starting to wonder if this ruling over the world thing is a good idea. I can’t even rule over my own books. Well, too late now. The plan has begun.

Gravity,

Perhaps zero gravity.

The starving beast has awakened,

Struggles, but cannot be free.

Want to grow a pair of wings,

But cannot escape this gravity planet.

"We are all a part and only a part of this world. "...

An astronaut,

Floating in space.

Want to touch that borderline,

zero gravity.

Where the light of all the stars meets.

Yet cannot get rid of his space suits.

It's time to put the mask back on.

I am a human mimicking slime…

I have been observing people lately.

Parents with their kids,

Fast-walking person with suits on,

A young boy and a young girl,

A curious foreigner with a backpack.

Maybe, and just maybe.

I can turn into a beetle,

and fly away.

The sky will be my drawing board,

The grass can be my bed.

Raindrop can be my fountain,

The moon can be my friend.

It seems like everything will be amazing,

In that zero gravity.

I will be free,

In ALL gravity.

The liquid of static noise,

Flood my sense of consciousness.

It always reminds me,

" You are not living, but reacting."

Perhaps, we are all castaways,

In some worlds,

At some time,

With someone…

The astronaut removed his space suits.

His flesh and blood floating freely, in the universe.

In zero gravity, with all the gravity.

"Genius rises and falls faster than you can say Ritz cheese crackers."

This time, I am proud to say that I can make art again (Actually make myself feel satisfied with it) XD

"No matter how hard your dreams seem, keep going. You might even have to climb up the side of a building in downtown LA, but it'll all be worth it at the top."

When I first stepped onto the soil of the Netherlands, I was struck by a canvas painted with broad strokes of sophistication and quaint charm—a sort of pastoral modernity that captures the eye and the heart. The cities, resplendent with their mix of historic canals and sleek, contemporary architecture, seemed to echo the past while proudly proclaiming their place in the future. Amsterdam's labyrinthine waterways, Utrecht’s bustling streets, and Rotterdam's daring designs: each city a chapter in a storybook that promises more than just a glimpse into the Dutch way of life.

The Dutch themselves are an embodiment of this beautiful paradox. Polite and respectful, with an easy smile and a readiness to help, they move through their cities with graceful efficiency. Cyclists whir by in a blur of activity, epitomising a healthy and environmentally conscious lifestyle. It's hard not to admire their striking balance between calm composure and vibrant living. Whether it's the stunningly handsome or the effortlessly beautiful, their appearance seems to reflect their lifestyle—active, healthy, and incredibly welcoming.

Language, often a barrier thick as a fortress wall in many countries, is a mere curtain here, brushed aside with ease as nearly everyone switches to English with a fluency that is both impressive and a relief, despite knowing some Dutch myself. This linguistic agility opened up avenues of deeper connection and understanding during my stay, culminating in a medical academic conference where I stood as a speaker. Presenting on intricate matters of clinical medicine and novel surgical technology, surrounded by peers equally adept in their fields, I felt a seamless part of a global dialogue—a testament to the country’s inclusive and internationally minded spirit.

The culinary landscape in the Netherlands, much like its physical one, is a delightful surprise. From the hearty, comforting stroopwafels and bitterballen to the exquisite Michelin-starred offerings that dot the cities, the Dutch palette is as varied as it is delicious. Each meal is an invitation not just to taste but to savour and remember.

And oh, the vistas! Fields punctuated by the vivid hues of tulip blooms in the spring, the serene stretches of the countryside dotted with windmills and farmhouses, and the sea kissing the shores with a dutiful regularity. Each view seems to whisper a story of its own, a silent narrative that begs you to stop and listen with your eyes.

As my journey concluded, a certain melancholy took hold—the kind reserved for the end of delightful days and memorable sojourns. With its intriguing blend of old-world charm and new-age dynamism, the Netherlands had etched itself into my memory, inviting, almost imploring, for a return. And return I shall, for how could one resist such a hearty embrace of life and living? Indeed, the Dutch have mastered the art of inviting you in and making you yearn for just one more day in their picturesque land.

dear diary, its 04/22

SOOO A LOT CHANGED LIKE I SAIDDDD!!!

me nd L arent friends anymore. so this thing happened with a guy and she was having a panic attack over roblox and I told him cus i was worried and she got mad and blocked me and I also told her santa wasn't real bc apparently she didn't know and she got so mad so like shes lit a kid so idfc anymore abt being friends w her it was kinda immature on my part to be 14 and friends w an 11 year old.

i don't rlly play fortnite anymore, I'm tryna get back into it bc i miss it.

i also had like a short friendship with this guy ill call him "I' and basically he was super like idek he had crazy attachment (i do too but not this crazy i have boundaries) and within like 2 days he was telling me he loved me and saying "u better not be talking to other guys" and making me feel rlly uncomfortable in general. and ig most of it was my fault because I didn't wanna say anything so I js let him tell me those things i didn't tell him to stop and i js like was over it and i told him i didn't wanna be friends and i was rlly strict w it because after i told him that he was like "() don't leave me" and its js a crazy situation in general. i feel like i got a little attached also bc after the fact i kept checking to see if he messaged but i stopped doing that so yeaaaa anyways.

UPDATE: i dated that one guy. relationship lasted a couple weeks, we broke up js before our  1 mnth and i think he's like deadass gay now bc on tikyapp he was reposting how he's queer so uhm like i swear he confessed to me first bro. its always me falling for the zesty guys smh. KILL ME NOW

friends: m, b, k,

ive been so absolutely stressed lately, all my assignemtns are wack, its the 2 weeks off from school and ive still been bombarded with work. a whole business report that was due last sunday i spent half my fucking rest from school stressing over, my art homework i havent even looked at, my english extension 1 fucking thousand word short story which im almost certain i goofed up beyond belief, 2 whole novellas for english advanced, remember, i was given TWO WEEKS. TWO WEEKS. business studies only gave me ONE. im STRAPPED for time. as well as hanging out with my boyfriend, hanging out with my family, my birthday, my sisters birthday, i signed up for the gym as well close to my house because i kept having the worst fucking breakdowns to mum about my mental health and shit id get from my sister for totally nothing. i couldnt take it anymore. oh and to replace E, we're friends with K now. from the easter show, idk if i mentioned him or not, its not like anyone is actually paying attention to whatever im yapping about.

last friday i was hanging out with B and we bought condoms in town and we wnet back to hijs place to try them out. they were cappuccino "flavoured" but actaully it just tasted like nothing but holy crap could you smell it. he tried putting it in and we couldnt work out what we were doing wrong (we're both virgins btw, never come this far). i postioned him to yknow like my entrance and all he had to do was breach it n boom both our first times but it hurt like a BITCH like holy fuck OUCH i couldnt do it, i cried and cried it hurt so bad. thats all im gonna say bc im still just a kid (happy 16th birthday me btw) n exposing so much like this on the internet it weird, im only doing it bc im anonymous.

we were supposed to hang out on the following sunday but couldnt bc his dad said his mum said she just wanted time to herself n obviously i was heartbroken bc i spent ages convincing my parents to visit again on such short notice but fine, if she needed a rest day then so be it, i couldnt be mad. until it come out that she didnt say that, his dad was straight up fucking lying. so whats the issue??? what did i do??? i barely even see that dude and whenever i do its always been positive. so what, he just doesnt want me in his house??? own up to it then, dont blame it on your wife dawg geez louise.

so obviously B was pissed and we scheduled another hang out on tuesday (yesterday) so that everyone would have plenty of notice and cant cancel or fuck anything up. keep in mind B works like forever, 5 day weeks, always like 8~9 hours (i reckon thats illegal for someone of his age but wtv.). i ask him times bc its always usually 12-5 but this time it was 3.30 (the time his mum gets off work) til 8.30, i was staying for dinner. some reason his dads got this weirdo creep paranoia that if his little wife isnt in the house when i am, im gonna accuse him of RAPING ME???? has that happened before, Joe??? are you projecting??? Joe?? i dont even see him when i am over, hes always in his room and im NEVER away from B??? god knows what his issue is but thats why i couldnt be over til his mum came home. anyways, i baked cookies for B's family as a thank you for housing me all the time and always an 'i love you' bc B always does stuff for me n i hardly return the favour (he doesnt let me). its almost close to 3pm and i ask B when his mum gets off bc he said "like 3.30~4 usually" earlier, i was checking if there was a definitive time now. he messaged back sayinh he hates his parents and they can suck ass bc AGAIN the plans were RUINED. she agreed to work until SIX and she didnt want me over bc then she'd have to take me home again (my mum can pick me up?? that was never out of the picture??) so i was absolutely distressed at this because AGAIN?? i was SO EXCITED we were hanging out, i was losing my mind. i cried like a baby. it was embarrassing.

its wednesday now, B, with his totally full schedule of work and work and work and sleep decided to go out with his little boyfriends out bowling! then go to work then go for a little boyfriend homoerotic sleepover! frankly i was pissed. i was so jealous that his little friends got to see him and i didnt. it wasnt fair. the only reason i was ever leaving thw house was for B and i couldnt bc B has so much work all the time. and here he is, with spare time, spending it with other people. not even spending 5 minutes with me. not even messaging me. yeah sure maybe one or two messages but thats not good enough. and now i cant call him because hes gonna get bummed by his friends (my ex boyfriend will be there too! its his house! the one that bullied me after he dumped me! and got his other friend to get in on it to! both will be there, how amazing!)

i've been treating B like absolute dogshit and i cant tell if its my whacked out hormones, the stress of school work, lack of sleep or what. i get mad at him, i dry text him, i go mute and he has to put up with it. i addressed it last night and he said "yeah i noticed, i just let it slide, im being patient w you ik youre stressed" like thank you baby but WHAT you noticed?? and said nothing?? you let it slide??!! :( felt awful, i apologised a million times over but i still feel awful. somethings wrong with me.

he was at tenpin today and my sister (his ex, idk if i mentioned it but i lost readers due to lack of interest so idc anymore) decided to go to for her best friend to see her boyfriend (who lives in sydney now, hes down for the week) and i was STRESSING. i dont know why, B loves me so dearly but i keep thinking back to everythng my sister used to cry at me when i was just dating him and i freak out. theres a pit in my stomach just remembering it all.

it got particularly bad when he got home from bowling and said he was having a sleepover. i cried and cried, i was sobbing and got into an arguementn with my mother bc i wasnt contributing anything. its my sisters birthday so she wanted me showered and dressed to go for dinner but i felt so shit i didnt wanna go, i kept crying, snotting n wailing. i couldnt walk 5 steps without sobbing a little. i took a panadol for my headache and all i could think of were the intrusive (not impulsive!) thoughts telling me to overdose, telling me i dont deserve anyone around me, im such an asshole that they'd all genuinely be better off without all my drama and negativity. it was hard swallowing the panadol, i didnt know if i was strong enough to not take them all and just push through.

i didnt, obviously. but it was hard. i still dont feel all there.

im only writing this because i was talking to J about how im overthinking a lot and all my thoughts are in my head and she told me to write it down like my english teacher said all those months ago. i didnt immediately, but this was the breaking point. i cant keep thinking and not writing it down anymore. if i had more time id be more consistent but school is a bitch im drowning.

-vinsie

Hvers vegna?

Af hverju ekki?

Who?

Hver mun finna okkur á endanum?

Guð? Lúsífer? Brahma? Allah? Jahve? Shiva?

Hver er ég að spyrja hver mun finna mig þegar ég dey?

Hver er ég að deyja?

Hver er ég?

Er ég Guð?

Er ég Lúsifer?

Er ég dauði, lífið?

Er ég anda, tómarúm?

Er ég ég, eða ert þú þú?

Hver er það?

Þarf það að vera einn af þeim?

Ég veit ekki.

Og ég vil það ekki.

Vegna þess að þekking er það eitur sem skýtur spurningunni yfir.

Viskan er sá sjúkdómur sem eyðir heimskum.

Og á endanum munu hinir óvitru lifa af og hinir gáfuðu þjást.